You're not the only one...with Mixed Emotions

Well, so we enter the coda of a crazy past few weeks for me...and this time it's not just because of work. As you've probably guessed, I'm talking about the election. Never have I felt more invested (and obsessed) about how the country and state of California would vote.

Here I sit typing to you Wednesday morning while Matt Lauer chats away on "Today" and a huge part of me is thrilled...excited...invigorated...hopeful...while an equally huge part of me is saddened...disappointed...angered...crushed...

All month...I've had cautious optimism...people telling me, "Obama's got this in the bag." I've said..."talk to me election night and I'll tell you" and dammit, he did after all! As I saw this while sitting with Ken...


I could not help but feel pride. We did it! Reason prevailed...people listened to the issues...people made an informed decision...and we picked the right guy (finally) to send to the White House. Not since I voted Clinton in '96 have I voted on a winner in the presidential election...it feels damn good that for the first time in 12 years, my candidate won!

Then...the hangover...Proposition H8. I knew going into this that the outlook wasn't good. The Yes on 8's propaganda machine was showering over the golden state a bit too well...and as the early results came in last night, it didn't look great. Waking up this morning and checking on the results, it's better, but even being the optimist I am, I think this one's not gonna end up well.

It's definitely taken some of the glow off the victory with Obama. The fact that a majority of Californians...CALIFORNIANS, for crying out loud....would treat me as a second-class citizen is highly disappointing...I can't help but feel hurt by this.

So what to do at this point? Boycott straight weddings I'm invited to from this point on? Stick it to the churches that pushed for this discriminatory measure and vote for ones that take away THEIR rights? That's one way to go, but not sure it's the right way.

I'm a generally non-confrontational person, but a side of me really wants to do that...knowing that the love and strength of the MARRIAGES I've seen between my friends Ted & Larry and Keith & Brad are seen as NOT BEING EQUAL to straight marriages by 52% of California.

Here's what I know we can't do...WE CANNOT GIVE UP. To my friends who fought hard for No on 8...the ones who donated...the ones who campaigned...the ones who put themselves out there to try to knock this down. I thank you....we must not give up.

If the final tally still ends up with Yes winning, don't give up. It's a road block...one that we WILL get around. It may not be easy, but I just know it will happen...