VMA-Watch

So...watching the east coast feed of the VMA feed here with a few of my friends...through the night, I'll be blogging as we watch...

First thing...just saw an elephant the red-carpet during the pre-show...very confusing...

5:54 PM...Jim Cantiello (whose blogs we love on MTV.com)...seems VERY excited to be on the red carpet. Whee!

5:58 PM...They're saying Britney's not performing? I thought she was! BOO!

6:00 PM...Ooh...Britney....Eee...Britney in a comedy sketch...

6:02 PM...More elephants!

6:03 PM...Britney opener consists of welcome people to the awards and introducing the first act. That was it??? * sigh *

6:04 PM...Is that the cast from Captain EO entering with the lightsticks?

6:05 PM...Cue the first musical act of the night that I'm not familiar. I'm told her name is Rhianna.

6:06 PM...The strobe lights in Rhianna's act are making my DirecTV DVR go a little crazy...

6:07 PM...More of Rhianna's act. It's the hands from the "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" video...Ted zings further saying they're from the video for Olivia Newton John's "Heart Attack" video.

6:09 PM...I feel dirty looking at Russell Brand. Ted said he thought that Russell Brand was a character much in the way that Randy of the Redwoods was.

6:10 PM...Jonas Brothers...WOO! Rod arrives to join us in the VMA viewing! WOO-er!

6:11 PM...Russell Brand throwing some Obama love...ok...starting off well...

6:14 PM...Nick joins the VMA watching at my house. Ted just made his first joke at the expense of Nick's haircut...YAY!

6:15 PM...Hmm...interest in the show starting to wane in the room...

6:16 PM...Jamie Foxx is yelling...why is everybody yelling?!?

6:17 PM...Larry is annoyed that we're 17 minutes into the awards and there hasn't been a single award given. And somebody must have been listening because here comes the first award...

6:18 PM...Ted just remarked that Britney's "Piece of Me" is a big piece...

6:18 PM...Britney wins! And now we know why Britney made an apperance at the awards this year.

6:19 PM...Larry - "What's with the butterflies?"

6:20 PM...Pete Wentz looks REALLY cute tonight...

6:21 PM...A Jonas Brothers countdown...AHHHHHH!

6:21 PM...Just realizing...Is the set for the VMAs recycled from the Rock the Cradle set?

6:24 PM...OOH...Who's Locksley?

6:26 PM...HOORAY! Paris Hilton's My New BFF!!!!!!

6:27 PM...Asked the room if Russell Brand would be cute if he cleaned up? The room's unanimous decision...NO.

6:28 PM...Demi Moore looks fantastic...and you can see the teleprompter's reflection in the mirrors behind her. The mirrors remind me of the end of Xanadu...Larry just pointed out that the motif for the Best Male Video looks like a backwoods gloryhole.

6:29 PM...Ted's very happy that Chris Brown won. What...Chris Brown just mentioned Wheezy? Isabel Sanford's coming back from the dead for the VMA's?!?

6:30 PM...Time for the Jonas Brothers' number. Ted - "Are the Jonas Brothers on the Sesame Street set?"

6:31 PM...Time for the gayest debate of the night...It's about who's the cutest Jonas Brother....

6:33 PM...OK, the set change in the Jonas Brothers number was prety cool...

6:34 PM...Jonas Brothers are now singing in the Paramount New York backlot. Me - "There are people standing in the window!"; Larry - "That's because the Jonas Brothers are singing badly and people are jumping out of the window to commit suicide."

6:35 PM - 5 minutes to Michael Phelps!!!!

6:36 PM - Rod, Ted,and Larry are trying to educate Nick about the difference between Katie Perry and Jill Sobule's "I Kissed a Girl"...oh youth...

6:37 PM - Nick just pulled "Personal Jinx" on Ted...the rule: whoever calls jinx, someone else can say "personal jinx" and have control over that jinx. The rest of us call shenanigans...

6:39 PM - Nice camel toe, Katy Perry...Did we just join in the middle of her performance?

6:40 PM - Russell's "penis" was bleeped...

6:41 PM - The headphones on Michael Phelps' head doesn't help with the comparisons of him looking like Frankenstein's monster. Hmmm...not looking hopeful for his SNL hosting gig next week. Ted - "He hasn't blinked!"

6:42 PM - On Lil' Wayne...Larry - "I'm glad his clothes are layered"; Ted - "It's Milli AND Vanilli"

6:43 PM - Figuring out Lil' Wayne's hankie code...Ted - "Red means he wants to get fisted by Godzilla"

6:44 PM - Me - "Is that Slash?"; Ted - "No, it's slash yo' tires!"

6:45 PM - Larry - "I feel like i"m already at Universal Halloween Horror Nights"; Rod - "I can't take any of these guys seriously with his pants falling down."

6:47 PM - Rod - "What happened to Lindsay Lohan's face?!?"

6:47 PM - Come on down! You're the next contestants on the VMAs!

6:49 PM - Um...we can see the crew setting up for the next act in the background...

6:50 PM - Oh Pussycat Dolls, why are we bringing God and the troops into the VMAs?

6:55 PM - I'm so ready for "The Island" and "Rock of Love: Charm School"

6:58 PM - I'm so ready for the Twlight movie...even though I haven't ready the books...

7:08 PM - Did Russell just imply that he gave a blow job to one of the Jonas Brothers? And...Ted and I totally think Shia LeBouf looks like Pee Wee Herman..."Heard any good jokes lately?

7:10 PM - The food from Kung Pao Bistro isn't as good as it normaly is tonight... :-/

7:12 PM - OMG...PINK...She's angry...I guess that's what she gets for walking on the bad part of Sesame Street. This musical number is AWESOME!

7:15 PM - Ted - "Pink is the second coming of Joan Jett and Debbie Harry and..."; Mandel - "Susan Powter!"

7:21 PM - Is Ashlee voting her unborn fetus as the "Best New Artist"...and Pete Wentz is STILL adorable...

7:23 PM - Slipknot scares us...

7:26 PM - Jordin...really with the promise rings???

7:27 PM - Time for T.I.'s performance. Larry just busted out with the theme song to "Little Shop of Horrors"...I concur...

7:28 PM - I just made a Robin Givens reference and Nick didn't know who she was. Some educating is happening right now...

7:29 PM - Rhianna just popped up again. Larry - "I don't like it when hip-hop artists still good songs and shit on them..."

7:37 PM - HSM Cast! YAY, Zac! Larry - "I'm so over Zac Efron!" Me - "Well, don't you wanna be under him?"

7:40 PM - Xtina's new song sounds like "Kiss You Off" by Scissor Sisters and we love it...This number is like a gender-bender version of "Deal or No Deal!"

7:41 PM - Nothing is as it seems...Is she going to fly? Is that why her camel toe looks a little unusual?

7:42 PM - After the costume change by the male Deal or No Deal models...Rod - "Are those the Power Rangers?"

7:43 PM - YAY, Chace Crawford! BOO to Russell Brand backing off of his joke...if you're gonna do the joke, own it!

7:44 PM - Tokio Hotel accepts an award...Is that Kynt or Vyxsin from "The Amazing Race?" We're a little confused about the gender of the lead singer. Rod thinks it's one of the Jonas Brothers. We're all just confused.

7:45 PM - Jim Cantiello's back!

7:51 PM - The shot of McLovin when Paris Hilton makes her entrance. Why the face?

7:52 PM - Gee, I wonder if Jonas Brothers are gonna win for best pop video. I personally preferred Panic at the Disco's "Nine in the Afternoon."

7:53 PM - What's this? Another Britney win? Hmmm....

8:04 PM - Ted says that "Sweet Home Alabama" is about lynching and slavery. This makes the choice of who's singing the song with Kid Rock a bit peculiar.

8:10 PM - Larry - "[I know] I'm old because I don't like hip-hop music."

8:12 PM - Britney Spears says "I'm in shock." Me - "SO ARE WE!!!!"

8:13 PM - Me - "Where are they taking Britney?" Ted - "To Mulholland Drive!...Britney cleans up at the VMAs. The EMTs clean up Britney!"

8:15 PM - Kanye West is on stage...Nick and me - "Are those the drummers from the Beijing Olympics?"

8:18 PM - It's OVER!!!!!!